Turning an awkward question into an opportunity for connection
Have you ever found yourself fumbling for an answer when someone asks, “Tell me about yourself?”
It’s one of those deceptively simple questions that can feel unexpectedly difficult to answer. Whether you’re networking, interviewing for a job, or trying to connect with someone on a personal level, the way you respond can set the tone for the entire conversation.
So, how can you make your answer impactful and relevant?
Let’s explore how clarifying the question can help turn that awkward moment into a meaningful exchange.
We've all been there. You know when you find yourself rambling on about your life story when someone simply asks you to "tell them about yourself." It’s not fun and can feel awkward. It can feel like such a big or hard question to answer for some reason.
So today I’m going to dive into the power of clarification and explain how asking a simple follow-up question can transform our conversations and make them more meaningful and efficient.
Why you need to stop and ask for more context before answering
When someone asks us a question, we very rarely stop to ask them to clarify to ensure we’re actually giving them the answer they’re looking for.
If you said: “Jen, tell me more about yourself” - there are a million different things I could share with you. I could start from the day I was born and go deep into how my Mom curses me to this day about the kind of sleeper I am, all the way through to today and how I chose what I was going to eat for breakfast and cover details anywhere in between.
That is a lot of material to pull from and diving into a 5 minute monologue that has people’s eyes glazing over isn’t going to set us up for a productive rest of the conversation if they’re zoning out on the first question.
That’s why we need to clarify and gain more context so we know exactly what to share.
When to use the question
The next time someone says “tell me about yourself” clarify by asking:
“What would you like to know?”
This question always came up in job interviews when I worked in HR but other times I’ve personally experienced it is when I’ve been building relationships/networking online or in person, at a business meeting or with prospective clients.
Here are some conversation markers to keep in the back of your mind so you can navigate as effectively as possible when responding to “tell me about yourself”:
When someone asks you to tell them about yourself.
When you are asked a general question that could require a long answer.
When time is short and you want to be sure that your brief answer will be exactly what they were looking for.
Tailoring your follow-up question
Alternative variations of “what would you like to know?”
Job Interview
I’d be happy to expand. Are you interested in my recent work experience or something specific about my skills?
I can tell you about my professional background or my approach to problem-solving, which would be more helpful?
Relationship Building/Networking
Sure! Would you like to hear more about what I do for work or some of my hobbies?
There’s a lot I could share. Are you more curious about my job or where I’m from?
Prospective Client/Business Meeting
Absolutely! Would it be more useful to focus on my experience in the industry or the details of the current project?
I’m happy to dive into more of how we can help. Are you interested in learning more about our process or how we can meet your specific needs?
4 Follow-up questions
Here’s how to ensure you're on the right track by asking the right follow-up questions:
Does that cover what you were hoping to hear, or is there another aspect you’d like me to go into?
Did I cover what you were wondering about, or is there something else you’re curious about?
Did that answer your question, or would you like me to go into more detail on a specific part?
Is there anything else you’d like me to share about?
So in other words…
By simply asking, “What would you like to know?” you take control of the conversation and give the other person the opportunity to steer it in a direction that’s most valuable for them.
This approach saves time, makes the conversation more relevant and helps you leave a lasting impression. So next time you’re faced with that open-ended question, use the power of clarification to make your response more focused and impactful.
Until next time, keep nurturing those connections, one meaningful conversation at a time!